A Love that Only your Heart can Describe

You can Have Everything in Life you Want

Dr. Kathy said to ask yourself, "Who am I really?  What do I really want?"  And knowing this, "How, then, shall I live?"

I saw myself as a child in a meadow of weeds  and daisies and other wildflowers, all at eye level. There were tiny insects bouncing around the meadow too.  I saw bumble bees happily zooming around me and the different blossoms, before they smiled at me and buzzed away.  

I was with two dogs.  A hound and a German Shepard.  I must have been three years old at the most. The day was warm and the sky was blue - The farm was beyond the meadow, boasting a big barn and two giant sliver silos.  I could smell the cows and the fresh grass and soil.  I could feel the soft petals of the Black Eyed Susan's bordering the property.  I touched the cool large rocks here and there under which my brother once told me were good places for snakes to be happy.  I could hear myself talking with the dogs, bees, flowers, and Allah.  I was saying simple things about what they would like, what I like... how I feel... would I know them forever..

Then I saw my Grandfather who loved me so much - I was running to jump into his arms.  I saw, too, my father fishing with me at the pond - making me my own little rod out of bamboo.  He was laughing and joking with me.  He was so happy then.  I felt that precious innocent love that only he ever really could give.  The kind of love that a child is supposed to feel since birth from their mother.  It was as wonderful as if a mother/child bond - That sweet innocence that only your heart can describe.  And it remains there so deep inside that you almost forgot just how deep that place was - and from where you once felt that precious one of a kind love.  

I guess I am love and I want to be loved and I will love.  For now, that's where I must start.