Those who take kindness for weakness are not decent folks. They are users and predators.
Capone took them out, while I, on the other hand, learned to speak my mind and take them out of my life.
It usually takes, however, a long long time for me to get to this point. I want to be absolutely sure I was kind enough, patient enough, and generous enough first. Sometimes if it is family, for instance, it can take decades.
When you confront the abuser and user, they still expect you to back down when you see them bounce back up like a bobo doll. But you cannot. You will not. You mustn't.
If you want to keep evolving, you must raise the bar also - and reinforce the boundaries.
Be clear, concise, and calm for this second confrontation - And don't be surprised if the narcissist tries for round three after collecting herself and thinking up another plan. Again, wash, rinse, repeat. Don't even raise your voice.
Always remember : You no longer care about this individual now that you are SURE of who and what they are. You no longer will give an inch, a cent, a moment, or even a kind expression to this "person". It's over and you are just shoring up the boundaries in a matter of fact style.
Just the facts please.
Congratulations, you are no longer a victim or even a target. You are a good person who is together despite all that has been lost. What concerns you most now is self care and your promising future - Narcissist Free!!
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