Discovering the Possibilities....

John at the  VA Hospital

After a four year major depression and a full year flat on my back in bed, the past three years recovering have brought me this far in life.  Visiting others - offering them a fluffy snuggle and a gentle smile.

To a place where taking care of my mind, body, and soul are now first - and the taking care of little Dustie here is next.  My relationships with my husband and children are expressly full, and life over fifty seems anxiety free.

Sadly, the way to this healthy place for me was to first put my primary family away.  With my father now deceased, I am able to accomplish this seemingly awful task.

What a difference it has made in recovery.  As soon as I severed the last tie, my recovery sped to full-on health.  All my vitals are normal.  I only need medication for IBS and I still don't dare stop my Cymbalta for depression.  But, I discovered that over all these years of struggling to get better, it was nearly futile while still in contact with these damaging people.  As much as I wanted to love them and have them in my life, just constantly forgiving their behavior wasn't enough to protect myself - my mind - my soul - and even my body from being slowly shredded.  And I found that love just isn't always enough.

Mary with Dustie in local Nursing Home

Mary was thrilled to hold Dustie, my therapy rabbit, while recovering from a toe amputation - she said that he reminds her of her Bijon Frise puppy dog waiting for her at home.

I knew when I left this nursing home and then the VA hospital, today, that these people enjoyed Dusite and me.  That they won't be conjuring lies, or suddenly call me to tell me something negative about the visit.  On the contrary, these folks and all others in my life from now on, are harmless.  

When I was so heavily on the fence, a good friend told me to go ahead and sever that last tie with the NM family because there is a lot of real love out there to be had and I deserved to treat myself better - THANK YOU good friend.  Best advice I ever got in my life.

Today was a reminder of how the greater part of the world behave, interact, and what they want and need.  We harmless emapths I guess kind of should stick together and take care of ourselves and each other.